Online Dating... Do It Now!

I forget I met The Husband online until I talk about it... like now!

My online dating experience was a 10 year on again off again relationship. I went on the same dates with different people... most were really bad! When I met The Husband in 2016 I thought he was going to be another one to add to my long ass list of 1st dates at the bar of some trendy restaurant. Thank God that was not the case!

I will be 10000% honest... I hated online dating but there really was no other way for me to meet people. Overall I felt like it was a waste of time and very creepy! Most of the guys lied about their height and/or were socially awkward. I would show up in heels and dudes would greet me at my chin. Eventually I wore flats just to avoid the height issue and me having an attitude... but then there was the gut issue, teeth issue, walk issue, chew issue and many other issues because I get turned off very easily. Hey, I like what I like!

But, now that we are in the middle of a pandemic... how are people managing the online dating thing? Where do you go on the first "date"?

I talked to Brooke, a sales executive, about why she has finally decided to try online dating. Here's her story...

Name: Brooke

Age: 43

Status: Single

So, how long have you been single?

Well, I feel like I’ve been single for 3 1/2 years because my last “relationship” was more of a glorified friendship. However, If that has to count then 4 months or so.

Where do you usually meet people?

The gym, my building's social events or mutual friends... but I just joined an online dating site so i'm switching things up.

"I don’t like selfies in the bathroom mirror with the toilet paper roll and toilet in the background."

What made you decide to try online dating now?

I was really tired of wasting my time getting to know people who were wrong for me. After my last relationship or complicated friendship, I really thought about my dating experiences. I’m not a socialite - I don’t do clubs and I don’t run the streets. Outside of the gym, work and mutual friends I haven't met anyone. I had to do things differently so I decided to step outside of my comfort zone and try something new and terrifying.

Also, I was encouraged and motivated by several friends of mine have found love online.

I was so creeped out at first... Anything freak you out about meeting guys online?

I was always terrified of dating “strangers” online. Also, I've heard a lot of stories about frauds and guys pretending to be what you want after reading your profile instead of being their true selves. Putting myself out there online was one of the scariest things that I have ever done. I put it all out there with intentions on scaring off the wrong ones immediately. Also, I feel like men online will always be on the hunt even when they find happiness.

I can totally relate to the frauds! I remember being super picky about profiles because most of them sucked! What are your turn ons or offs?

If the photos are fuzzy and look 30 years old, that's a problem. I want to know what he looks like now not 30 years ago. I don’t like selfies in the bathroom mirror with the toilet paper roll and toilet in the background. Couldn't someone else have taken the picture? Could you have taken the selfie in a different room?

I don’t like misspelled words and grammatical errors on profiles. Those who don't take the time to proofread and take this seriously are not for me.

Also, photos with a weird camera angle and guys that lie about their height and age are huge red flags!

OMG! I didn't pay attention to photos with a bad camera angle until I met someone in person. His mouth was absolutely gross. I'm talking white stuff in the corners of his mouth disgusting and I was annoyed at myself for not catching that in his photos... Then I realized he somehow avoided showing his complete mouth in all of his photos! I had a bad attitude the whole date and he said I "Catfished" him with my personality. Lesson learned!

Found anyone interesting yet?

Yes... (laughs) and I'm very interested.

What about his profile made you want to know more?

I was immediately attracted to his appearance. But, after reading his profile I really liked everything he said about wanting to be in a committed relationship. He was tired of people wasting his time and so many other things he said resonated with me.

YAY! How often do you guys talk?

Daily, multiple times a day. We have great conversations!

Are there any concerns about meeting him in person? I really dreaded the first meet up but I always picked the place!

I was nervous as hell because of the online stranger thing. My friends and I researched him. However, my comfort zone was that he is a loving dad of 2 beautiful young girls who I have seen several times with him during FT and Zoom calls.  

What about the pandemic? I don't know how I would handle dating now.

It's scary as hell! Can't go anywhere without concern. Can't kiss or get too close because there are so many risks involved. It's so hard and it limits places we can go.

Have you met in person yet? If so, Yay or Nay?

YAY and YES, we met in person at an outside bar a couple of weeks ago. He looks just like his photos and we talked for hours! We were really feeling each other so we wanted to meet. We understand each other effortlessly. There is definitely a mental attraction there as well as physical. That’s huge for me because having a mental connection is so much more important to me than physically connecting.


I'm stopping here!

This sounds promising!! I hope his representative is in line with who he really is. Because, that is who we usually meet first. The representative get's you all interested, then after a while the real person shows up.

I'm anxious to hear what happens in a month. I just love a good dating success story... especially when it started online!

Good Luck Brooke!! My advice.... take it day by day with 0 expectations!


Adila F.Q.